I feel so multilingual after those last two posts

a hilarious joke

spookweedeveryday:

tanku:

three cats are competing in a race. there’s an american cat named “one two three”, a german cat named “ein zwei drei”, and a french cat named “un deux trois”. the cats all swim across a lake. the american cat finishes first, the german cat finishes second, but the french cat is nowhere to be found.

why?

because the un deux trois quatre cinq

IM LAUGHING SO HARD AT THIS JOKE IF YOU DONT UNDERSTAND IT I FEEL SO BAD FOR YOU 

(via everlasting-nostalgia)

even tho im beautiful i still get self conches sometimes :/

melongorl:

blueoceanstrongemotion:

Conscience** 😌

how are u gonna try to correct me and then not even put the right word …

(via satans-used-tampon)

I’m hot af as fuck

(Source: no, via microwavewife)

samchekov:

heyfunniest:

WOW

If you ever feel bad about running a 16 minute mile

cooldudebro:

let me lay down some facts for you:

  • aliens are real
  • horoscopes are real
  • skeletons are real
  • star wars is probably real
  • linkin park is almost too real

(via satans-used-tampon)

toxicwinner:

how many times have i seen the prettiest girls w the ugliest guys and I’m staring at him wondering if it’s the way the light is hitting his face or smth and she’s looking at me like stay away from my man…listen im just trying to solve a puzzle you beautiful idiot

(via satans-used-tampon)

nyehs:

the ONLY acceptable comment on my selfies

  • image

(via squidwarcl)

basedheisenberg:

Being drunk does not excuse cheating.

Being drunk does not excuse rape.

Being drunk does not excuse being an asshole.

Being drunk does not excuse shitty and destructive behavior.

Being drunk is not an excuse.

Control yourself or don’t drink.

(via unicornnoob)

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